Sunday, August 17, 2008

I want to be a Syncro Diver

In lieu of . . .

1. Preparing for school to start
2. Converting the office to the soon-to-be Big Kid bedroom
3. Sleeping

I've been obsessively watching the Olympics. The night before I went back to work, I stayed up until 2am watching Gymnastics.

Yesterday (after swearing that I wouldn't), I watched the entire Women's Marathon and marveled at how that Romanian chick could run multiple victory laps after WINNING a 26.2 mile race. For comparison, you should remember that I completed a marathon in triple that time and could not walk properly for a week.

Today, I lost 30 minutes of my life to Dressage--which I now know to be Snooty-Horse-Prancing.

(this horse is called Special Ed. omg.)

In my enthusiasm, I accidentally erased my entire TIVO by scheduling a Season Pass of ALL OLYMPIC EVENTS. [Remember, HD shows take up a lot of space--especially when they're 8 hours a piece]

So I've prioritized. Here are the highlights of the Olympics according to Debo:

Synchronized Diving:

I love watching those Chinese divers and their robotic precision. I know that they're a little more "motivated" than the other athletes (get a medal or exile to the countryside), but it's amazing how they do all those flips together.

Also, I am inspired by the story of Dmitri Sautin who overcame a SEVERE STABBING to return to Olympic competition

Mens: This has been a hard year for Nu's people as we watched the Japanese men fall off one apparatus after the next. Never mind a medal, they just wanted to live through the All-Around. Maybe it was the hairgel?

On the plus side, this guy is a shoe-in for the next "Agony of Defeat" video montage.

Womens: So great! Love Nastia! Love Shawn! Only complaint: all the girls looked so pale and pasty under the bright lights. I know they don't have time to sunbathe during training, but they should really consider a Mystic Tan before they go on camera again.

The Chinese: Wow. Those communists really know how to motivate their athletes. They see their parents once a year, forge their birth dates on their passports, and are FREAKISHLY strong despite the fact that not one of them weighs more than 100lbs.

Bela Karolyi: I'm sure it sounded like a great idea for him to commentate for NBC, but he's clearly gone off the reservation. He has become a story unto himself by calling the underage Chinese gymnasts "half-people" while giving Bob Costa a near-stroke every time he makes a new inflammatory comment. Love it.


Mens: Michael Phelps looks bored with winning medals. It's sad when you win the gold, break another World Record, and can't even summon up the enthusiasm for a fist-pump.

Womens: Australia and New Zealand are SO fast! Do you think it's because they have lots of practice swimming away from all those man-eating sharks down there?

Beach Volleyball:
Since when was it acceptable to play an Olympic sport wearing Pasties and a Bikini-bottom? Not cool.

Track & Field is just getting started, but I just can't wait for the Discus competition to begin.


Unknown said...

Frikin Nippon sucked in gymnastics. They plain sucked... or was it the 'Made in China' apparatuses that screwed them? Perhaps some bad won ton soup? Rigged spring rolls?

Blogger design by - background image by Wagner Campelo